I will not build mythologies to justify my regrets and failures. I will confront them nakedly and speak about them with shame and honest admission. I will not tell myself that it all happened for the best. I will not delude myself into denial. I will confront the anxiety of choices that cleave my life into what is, what can be and what could have been. I will not accept the world given to me as a helpless figure. When confronted with no choice but to compromise and settle, I will whine, argue, and speak with whoever has the patience to listen and the will to engage. I will listen carefully to those around me - how they speak about their lives, desires, accomplishments and disappointments. I will learn to discern when they're honest and when they speak to construct an image. I will prefer loneliness to the company of one who speaks the language of money, image and status. Still, I must understand them. I must understand the one who is made to suffer. Who is subjected to violence. I must understand that human whose suffering ensures my luxury. I must understand the system that fixes me and that human in our positions and prevents us from sharing a roof and a plate with food on it. I must constantly try to reject an economy of humanity. A rational economy which creates scarcity, strips us of our dignity and gives us the injunction to enjoy our suffering and lack of freedom. I will scream whenever I can. I will read whenever I can. I will listen whenever I can. I will talk about the beauty I see in the socialist dream of a city with nobody sleeping on the street, a meal assured every day and illness tackled with the support of fellow workers behind me. I will resist solipsistic delusions of "I" and realize that I am made by who I talk to, what I read and who raised me. That I am a collection of influences. That I am deep down the bricklayer who made my house, the teacher who taught me how to think, the family that toiled to pay for my school, the friend who spoke words of comfort when I wept, the women who showed me affection, resilience and love. I am them. And I will not accept a world that fails them every day. In a world that punishes failure, I will speak of success with contempt. In a world that asks me to prove my worth in the market, I will speak of money with derision. As the world burns around me, with me in it, I will look into the fire and scream with horror instead of gazing up at the sky to recite poetry about stars. I will hope to lend a hand to one who needs it. If we fail then perhaps in our collective bellow we will find some dignity in our destruction.